BIBLICAL PATHWAYS TO A FRUITFUL MARITAL LIFE

Marriage is not a societal invention but a design by God. Despite the numerous destructive forces that have challenged marriage, it has not been completely destroyed or replaced. A marriage that starts in accordance with God's design and is upheld by following His commands will not lack God's supply but succeed and flourish. God's intended design for marriage will bring about continuous peace, temperance, joy, and not enduring pains nor sorrow of heart. In the book of Proverbs 12:28 stated that, "In the way of righteousness is life: and in the pathway thereof there is no death".Here,it confirmed that there are pathways in the Bible to a fruitful marital life. Here are some key principles:

1. Mutual Love and Respect: Ephesians 5:33 encourages husbands to love their wives and wives to respect their husbands.Building mutual love and respect in a marriage is a continuous process that requires both partners' active participation. By implementing these strategies, you can foster a loving and respectful relationship that stands the test of time.This mutual love and respect create a foundation for a healthy and fruitful marriage.

2. Selflessness and Sacrifice: Philippians 2:3-4 teaches couples to prioritize the needs of their spouse above their own.Demonstrating selflessness and sacrifice in marriage is essential for building a strong and healthy relationship.This means that you Put your partner's needs and desires before your own by encouraging your partner to pursue their dreams and goals, even if it means making sacrifices yourself. Be their biggest cheerleader and provide emotional support throughout their journey. Show genuine interest in their well-being and happiness. Ask them about their day, listen actively, and offer support when needed. Not only that, share responsibilities among each other. Take an equal share of household chores, parenting duties, and financial responsibilities. Be willing to step in and help when your partner is overwhelmed or needs assistance. By practicing selflessness and sacrifice, couples can build a strong bond and foster a fruitful marital life.Always remember that selflessness and sacrifice should be mutual in a healthy marriage. Both partners should strive to create a loving and supportive environment where each person's needs are valued and respected.

3. Communication and Unity: Ephesians 4:2-3 emphasizes the importance of maintaining unity and practicing effective communication. Here, there is need to Communicate openly and honestly. In this process, you foster open and honest communication with your partner. Discuss your needs, desires, and concerns openly, and encourage them to do the same. This helps build trust and understanding, allowing you to make selfless decisions together.This also is the foundation of any successful marriage. Take the time to listen to your partner's thoughts, feelings, and concerns, and express your own in a respectful manner. Avoid criticism, defensiveness, and contemptuous behavior.Open and honest communication helps couples understand each other better and resolve conflicts, leading to a more fruitful marriage.

4. Forgiveness and Grace: Colossians 3:13 encourages spouses to forgive one another as the Lord forgave them.Understand that no one is perfect, and mistakes will happen. Practice patience and forgiveness when your partner makes errors or falls short. Offer support and help them learn from their mistakes.Always remember that conflicts are inevitable in any relationship, but it's important to handle them in a healthy and respectful manner. Practice active listening, compromise, and find solutions that work for both of you. Practice active listening, compromise, and find solutions that work for both of you. By extending forgiveness and showing grace, couples can overcome challenges and build a fruitful marital life.

5. Commitment and Faithfulness: Hebrews 13:4 emphasizes the importance of marital faithfulness. Remaining committed to one another and honoring the marriage vows contribute to a fruitful and lasting relationship.Also,trust is the cornerstone of a strong marriage. Be honest and transparent with each other, and avoid keeping secrets or betraying each other's trust. Trust builds a solid foundation for love and respect to flourish.

6. Prayer and Seeking God's Guidance: Proverbs 3:5-6 advises couples to trust in the Lord and seek His guidance in all aspects of their marriage. Prayer is a form of communication with a higher power, often seen as a way to connect with God and seek guidance, support, and blessings. In the context of marriage, prayer plays a significant role in seeking God's guidance and wisdom for making important decisions, resolving conflicts, and strengthening the bond between partners. Couples may pray individually or together, expressing their desires, concerns, and gratitude to God. They may seek guidance on various aspects of their marriage, such as making major life choices, resolving conflicts, improving communication, or seeking wisdom in difficult situations. Prayer can also be a way to express gratitude for the blessings in their relationship and to ask for God's help in nurturing love, trust, and understanding.

Through prayer, couples aim to deepen their spiritual connection with each other and with God, seeking His guidance and wisdom to navigate the challenges and joys of married life. It is believed that prayer can bring comfort, clarity, and strength to couples, helping them to align their actions and decisions with God's will and to grow in their love and commitment to each other. Regular prayer and seeking God's wisdom can lead to a fruitful marital life.

7. Intimacy and Emotional Connection: 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 highlights the importance of physical intimacy within marriage. In other words, it is physical affection and intimacy that are vital in maintaining a strong emotional connection. Regularly express love, both verbally and physically, to keep the spark alive in your marriage.In addition to this, try to understand your partner's perspective and put yourself in their shoes. Empathy allows you to connect on a deeper level and helps prevent misunderstandings and conflicts.Building emotional connection and maintaining a healthy sexual relationship contribute to a fruitful marital life.It is laso important to prioritize quality time together. Make time for each other and prioritize your relationship. Engage in activities that you both enjoy and create opportunities for meaningful conversations and shared experiences.Take for instance, you can Plan regular date nights or activities that you both enjoy. This shows your commitment to the relationship and allows you to connect on a deeper level.

8. Demonstrate genuine appreciation and gratitude:: "A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity" (Proverbs 17:17; Read Ephesians 5:22-33). It is crucial to consistently convey your heartfelt appreciation for your partner's endeavors, regardless of their magnitude. Take the time to recognize and acknowledge their valuable contributions to the relationship, as this fosters a deep sense of mutual respect and love. By expressing your gratitude for their efforts and sacrifices, you convey the message that their presence in your life is truly cherished and treasured.

It is important to note that every marriage is unique, and these principles should be applied with love, grace, and understanding. As christians, couple must never give up easily, continuously working on the relationship by the grace of God bestowed upon you.Reflect on your own actions and behaviors, and be open to feedback from your spouse. Strive to be selfless and make sacrifices for the betterment of the relationship. Marriage requires ongoing effort and commitment. Regularly assess your relationship, identify areas for improvement, and actively work on strengthening your bond.Seeking guidance from pastors, mentors, and studying the Bible together as a couple can further enhance the application of these principles in a marital relationship.

THE REASONS FOR MARRIAGE

There are several reasons and benefits of marriage, both from a secular and biblical perspective. In a biblical context, marriage is considered a sacred covenant between a man and a woman, ordained by God. Here are some reasons and benefits of marriage, explained with biblical references:

1. Companionship: One of the primary reasons for marriage is to find a lifelong companion. In the book of Genesis, God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18). Marriage provides a partner to share life's joys, sorrows, and challenges.

2. Unity and Oneness: Marriage is a union that brings two individuals together as one. In the New Testament, Jesus quotes Genesis and emphasizes the unity of marriage, saying, "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh" (Matthew 19:5). Marriage fosters a deep emotional, spiritual, and physical connection between spouses.

3. Procreation and Family: Another purpose of marriage is to create a stable environment for procreation and raising children. In Genesis, God blessed Adam and Eve, saying, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it" (Genesis 1:28). Marriage provides a foundation for building a family and nurturing children in a loving and secure environment.

4. Mutual Support and Encouragement: Marriage offers a platform for mutual support, encouragement, and growth. The apostle Paul writes, "Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up" (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). Spouses can rely on each other for emotional, spiritual, and practical support throughout life's journey.

5. Spiritual Growth: Marriage can serve as a means for spiritual growth and sanctification. The apostle Paul compares the relationship between Christ and the Church to that of a husband and wife, stating, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:25). Through the challenges and joys of marriage, individuals can learn to love sacrificially, forgive, and grow in their faith.

6. Protection and Fidelity: Marriage provides a framework for commitment, faithfulness, and protection. The book of Proverbs advises, "Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth" (Proverbs 5:18). Marriage establishes a covenant of fidelity, ensuring that spouses remain committed to each other and protect their relationship from external temptations.

7. Social and Legal Benefits: Marriage also offers various social and legal benefits, such as inheritance rights, tax benefits, healthcare decisions, and legal protections. These benefits help create a stable and secure environment for the couple and their family.

It is important to note that while marriage is highly valued in the Bible, it does not diminish the worth or value of individuals who are not married. Widowhood or Singleness is also honored and respected in the biblical context, as it allows individuals to fully devote themselves to God's work (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).

SETTLING FOR THE FUTURE (SINGLES)

God is still saying that “I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. Be ye not as the horse, or as the mule, which have no understanding: whose mouth must be held in with bit and bridle, lest they come near unto thee” (Psalm 32:8-9). God of heaven and earth, who created all things and you as the heir of His creation is interested in journey of life, most especially, in the marriage. He has promised to guild and lead us in every decision to take on earth. Having a bright future is the desire of everyone both believers and non-believers. It is said to realize the fact that very few achieve this desire for a bright future. A bright future is largely dependent on a happy marriage (Psalm 128:1-6). Marriage is one of the most sacred institutions in life. Marriage or the journey together of a man and a woman in the holy matrimony signals the family life.

As believers, our marriage must be directed and guided by God’s word so as to achieve the purpose for which God set it up. It is sad that the guiding scriptural principles on marriage are deliberately being ignored by many so-called Christians today resulting in incalculable spiritual loss, frustration, disappointment, unfaithfulness, sorrow, and at times separation for couples that were joined together in the church of the living God. Heaven is very sad at the sight of multitude of Christian going contrary to the will, purpose and plan of God in their choice of life partners. Life goals have been aborted, ministries cut short joy ruined and life destroyed as a result of disobedience to God’s command. Scores of young men and women, who should be on fire for God, groan under the painful consequence of wrong choice in marriage. This is why a clear teaching on marriage and family life is very important to enhance the health and spiritual wholeness of the church today.

God is our creator. He holds the future in His hand; He knows our end from the beginning. It is therefore important to come into relationship with Him who holds the future. It is as we give lives to the Lord in genuine repentance and get born again that God begins to direct the affairs of our lives through His Spirit. “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17). The carnal mind cannot fully comprehend the leading of God and consequently cannot obey the scriptural principles of marriage. The believer’s relationship with God has to do with his level of his consecration. This certainly will be of help in his desire for a bright future.It is a well-known fact that mortality in our present world has taken a download journey into the deep abyss. This downward trend in mortality in our society has affected and influenced the marriage institution and has also crept into the church so much that the church has become worldly and the so called believers today have taken to the perilous course in searching and securing life partners. Some of these practices that lead to a bleak future include:

The way of boy/girlfriend relationship culminating into marriage.Attraction to physical attributes – beauty, complex, height and size etc.

Educational qualifications, permissive methods, reliance on godfather for match making, and instruction without inspiration.Wrong choice in marriage is always costly and greatly consequential, sometimes irredeemable.

REASONS FOR MARRIAGE

"And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?" (Matthew 19:4-5).

God’s plan, purpose and provision at the beginning - Genesis 2:18, 20, 22, 24; Matthew:19:4-5; Ephesians 5:31.

Divinely ordained necessity – Genesis 2:18; Ephesians 5:23; 1Corinthians 12:21; Psalm 68:6.

God setteth the solitary in family”, Man and woman are mutually dependence for is the man without the woman, neither is the woman without the man, in the Lord. (1Corinthians11:11).

Preservation of purity in the church and in the community – 1Corinthians 7:2, 9-11; Matthew 19:10-11; 1Timothy 5:9-15.

Marriage is one of God’s methods to keep men and women free from fornication and Immorality. God make no provision in His word for young people to have friends for Fleshly pleasure. Secret love among youth is evil in the sight of God.

Completeness and fulfillment of true living – Ephesians 5:23,29-31; Ecclesiastes 4:9-11. Marriage provides needed fellowship, comfort, companionship and partnership.

Complement to God’s work of procreation – Genesis 1:27-28; 9:1; Psalm 128:3; Malachi 2:15; Ephesians 6:1-3

MARRIAGE – A DIVINE INSTITUTION OF GOD

"And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him...And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Genesis 2:18, 21-24).

Marriage is a divine institution ordained by God to fulfill a divine purpose. Before the institution of marriage, God made necessary preparation in order for the man to enjoy the best.But today in various segments of the society, many get into this sacred institution unprepared and this has brought confusion into many lives. Ironically, many of the young people wishing to get into marriage do not even know the meaning, purpose and necessary preparations for the marriage.

Marriage is cleaving together of a man and a woman in harmony with God’s plan for their lives, having obtained their parents’ consent, thus becoming one interdependent being all the remaining days of their lives. Since preparation prevents poor performance, It is very important to prepare well for such a life long experience if the relationship is to be enjoyed.

The marriage ordinance is God’s institution that must be executed in God’s own way. The conjugal union at the Eden before the fall remains the abiding model for all believers to emulate. The rash of divorces across the world can never alter the standard that God ordained. God unalterable injunction for marriage remain one husband, one wife; no remarriage.

A true child of God will never opts for divorce in spite of problems. God’s grace should enable us to work on our marriages, and forgive all offences. “…With God all things are possible”(Mark 10:27).

MARRIAGE - NUGGET FOR SINGLES

BUCK – PASSING

My Beloved, Don’t blame the Lord That His proven double-edged sword Appears too blunt for your sorrow And the ageless balm of Gilead Does nothing on your marital woe.

Remember, dearly beloved, remember When He spoke times without number “Tis not good for the man to be alone” Let him ask for help meet for him Let her ask for the crown of her own Well said! You declared.

But ere not I have increased in knowledge, And my barns are over-filled without measure. Anyway, none appear good for the Holy wedlock of my dream. For Peter was hasty and Paul a kill-joy Phillip was restless always willing to “go ye”, Mary takes risks – going to the tomb alone.

Having had some evils could she ever be free? All other women are no better: Thus you put off thoughts of marriage Until you pass’d the prime of age, And your prayers, now more of haste less of faith, Fall off the Lord of heaven’s ears, For he gives nothing – only by faith.

Yet the Lord is full of mercy And to entreat him is so easy Be sorry for your pride of life And the flinty hardness of your heart You’ll receive your Adam or Eve.

American Bible Society

American Bible Society, Bibles.com